Anything Goes

Aye, Mammal: Pornder over this

Thu, 09 May 2013 12:37:22 -0400

Let’s begin this article with a girl. Call her Kelly. Or Nicole. Actually, you could call her anything depending on which corner of the world’s women you find most appealing. Now picture the young blonde, generously endowed Kelly, who is set to attend a job interview clad in a tight bust…

Austen

Thu, 09 May 2013 12:35:00 -0400

Why Emma? Why is she the only one who gets a book named after her?

"After learning my flight was detained 4 hours, I heard the announcement: If anyone in the vicinity..."

Thu, 02 May 2013 10:18:48 -0400

“

After learning my flight was detained 4 hours,
I heard the announcement:
If anyone in the vicinity of gate 4-A understands any Arabic,
Please come to the gate immediately.

Well—one pauses these days. Gate 4-A was my own gate. I went there.
An older woman in full traditional Palestinian dress,
Just like my grandma wore, was crumpled to the floor, wailing loudly.
Help, said the flight service person. Talk to her. What is her
Problem? we told her the flight was going to be four hours late and she
Did this.

I put my arm around her and spoke to her haltingly.
Shu dow-a, shu- biduck habibti, stani stani schway, min fadlick,
Sho bit se-wee?

The minute she heard any words she knew—however poorly used—
She stopped crying.

She thought our flight had been canceled entirely.
She needed to be in El Paso for some major medical treatment the
Following day. I said no, no, we’re fine, you’ll get there, just late,

Who is picking you up? Let’s call him and tell him.
We called her son and I spoke with him in English.
I told him I would stay with his mother till we got on the plane and
Would ride next to her—Southwest.

She talked to him. Then we called her other sons just for the fun of it.

Then we called my dad and he and she spoke for a while in Arabic and
Found out of course they had ten shared friends.

Then I thought just for the heck of it why not call some Palestinian
Poets I know and let them chat with her. This all took up about 2 hours.

She was laughing a lot by then. Telling about her life. Answering
Questions.

She had pulled a sack of homemade mamool cookies—little powdered
Sugar crumbly mounds stuffed with dates and nuts—out of her bag—
And was offering them to all the women at the gate.

To my amazement, not a single woman declined one. It was like a
Sacrament. The traveler from Argentina, the traveler from California,
The lovely woman from Laredo—we were all covered with the same
Powdered sugar. And smiling. There are no better cookies.

And then the airline broke out the free beverages from huge coolers—
Non-alcoholic—and the two little girls for our flight, one African
American, one Mexican American—ran around serving us all apple juice
And lemonade and they were covered with powdered sugar too.

And I noticed my new best friend—by now we were holding hands—
Had a potted plant poking out of her bag, some medicinal thing,

With green furry leaves. Such an old country traveling tradition. Always
Carry a plant. Always stay rooted to somewhere.

And I looked around that gate of late and weary ones and thought,
This is the world I want to live in. The shared world.

Not a single person in this gate—once the crying of confusion stopped
—has seemed apprehensive about any other person.

They took the cookies. I wanted to hug all those other women too.
This can still happen anywhere.

Not everything is lost.

”

- Naomi Shihab Nye (b. 1952), “Wandering Around an Albuquerque Airport Terminal.” I think this poem may be making the rounds, this week, but that’s as it should be. (via oliviacirce)

watershedplus: Artwork of the week Touched echo, 2007Markus...

Fri, 08 Feb 2013 13:19:57 -0500

watershedplus:

Artwork of the week

Touched echo, 2007
Markus Wilson

On February 13, 1945, during the final stages of WWII, large air raids by Allied Forces virtually flattened the old town of Dresden. Touched echo takes people right back to that fateful day.
Identifiable only by four small plaques, it is a place of silent contemplation rather than a monumental memorial. By leaning onto the railing of the terrace with the elbows placed on the railing and the hands covering the ears, visitors are able to hear sounds of airplanes and bombs exploding, transported from the railing via bone conduction, a technology developed for hearing devices.
it is completely silent unless you touch the railing.

http://www.markuskison.de/#touched_echo

HEE HEE

Fri, 08 Feb 2013 07:28:43 -0500

There are very few things better than idiot animals

"When someone tries to hand me out a flyer, it’s kind of like they’re saying, “Here, you throw this..."

Fri, 08 Feb 2013 07:21:16 -0500

“When someone tries to hand me out a flyer, it’s kind of like they’re saying, “Here, you throw this away.””

- Mitch Hedberg (via ashugostuffetpleases)

‘Victorian paper, now rather brittle’ I love magic...

Mon, 28 Jan 2013 09:40:24 -0500

‘Victorian paper, now rather brittle’

I love magic tricks. And I love old books. So it was rather good luck to find this. The website is called www.fromoldbooks.org, and it’s got a wonderful archive of beautiful illustrations from incredibly old books (look at how many flattering adjectives I’ve used. Tells you that I do mean it). I’m only putting up a couple of pictures from this book called Conjuring Tricks by an anonymous author. I’m also putting the cover of the book here. Wouldn’t it be absolutely golden-ticket-awesome to find something like this in a bookshop somewhere?

I love Flavorwire

Sat, 26 Jan 2013 10:36:00 -0500

I love Flavorwire:

It’s a sort of one-stop shop for all pop-culture junkies. I have found scrawesome* pictures of old stuffed toys and zombie short stories by Atwood and fantastic reviews of Girls there (that’s a show, please note). There’s art and television and movies and books, even music, if you happen to swing that way.

But you know what I’d really like? I’d like an Indian Flavorwire. I’d like news from the neighborhood- this neighborhood. Could someone get cracking on that, please?

*scary+awesome

I know what was on TV today

Sat, 26 Jan 2013 10:10:23 -0500

It so happens, and this might have something to do with warm beds and cold floors, that in my old age I’ve become quite fascinated by the television. Oh, it’s always been around, and for a while in the nineties, it was my best friend. We fell apart towards the end of the decade though. No special issues, just a sort of drifting away. I turned to real life dramas and it found comfort in my grandmother.

But as it is with old friends who never quite let go, we are back to a strange, distracted sort of relationship. We don’t know much about each other yet, and I’m less easily amused now. Sometimes, it works hard to please me, and I find myself moved, grateful for such selfless attention. Other times, I think it gets tired. After all, relationships shouldn’t be such hard work.

But we are figuring each other out. It was all too tentative in the beginning, but I think that I know just what buttons to push now; what questions to ask and what dark places to stay away from. I know what gets it going, and I think it knows my weaknesses too. We still can’t spend too much time together. Things are still precarious and tricky. I’m easily distracted too, and far too quick to judge. But I appreciate the good times. I like that it can make me laugh and cry and think and shout and scream, but it’s also okay with me just lying in bed, drifting off to sleep as it speaks. It isn’t perfect, but I think we could go the distance, if we just try hard enough.

You are here. That pale blue dot you see? That’s where you...

Sat, 26 Jan 2013 09:28:15 -0500

You are here. That pale blue dot you see? That’s where you are. That’s where we all are.

This is what Wikipedia has to say about it- “The Pale Blue Dot is a photograph of planet Earth taken in 1990 by the Voyager 1 spacecraft from a record distance of about 6 billion kilometers (3.7 billion miles) from Earth, as part of the solar system Family Portrait series of images. In the photograph, Earth is shown as a tiny dot (0.12 pixel in size) against the vastness of space.

This is what astronomer Carl Sagan had to say about it- “From this distant vantage point, the Earth might not seem of any particular interest. But for us, it’s different. Consider again that dot. That’s here. That’s home. That’s us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was, lived out their lives. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every “superstar,” every “supreme leader,” every saint and sinner in the history of our species lived there – on a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam.”

I'm back from my silence

Sat, 26 Jan 2013 09:20:18 -0500

With not much to say. It’s been almost an year, so this lack of material seems strange. But of course there is stuff. Stuff that’s happened and stuff that hasn’t happened. Both equally important.

But you see, it’s like meeting an old friend after years. You want to wrap up your life in a neat little parcel and present it to them. Instead, you wrap it in two little words.

‘Not much’.

What a Genius.

Wed, 04 Apr 2012 15:15:05 -0400

I try and not shove things down people’s throats, but YOU MUST READ THIS, All of you.

Go on, click it.

(There’s probably something disturbing about the fact that this is what I choose to shove down people’s throats, no puns intended of course.)

It’s a different sort of pun, read before you perv.

Being ill

Wed, 04 Apr 2012 12:59:45 -0400

Has it’s advantages.

If you are ill, lying in bed and gorging on these is very acceptable.

A big shout-out to Ms Clark, Ms DeForest and Ms Walker. I’m still a little confused about ‘He’ll render you very dead’, (Said by Mr. Cowboy to Ms. Heiress, ofcourse), but other than that, these cardboard cutouts of gorgeous turkey farmers and bounty hunters are pretty great. I’m running out of them now, which is making me nervous. There’s a nice little David Lodge on my bedside table that I’m sure is mocking me, wittily of course, because Lodge is very witty, but I can’t help it. I’m afraid I’m a goner.

I must soon visit that man who sells second hand mills and boons and harlequin romance (yes, that’s what they are, in case you didn’t guess). No reason. He’s just a nice man, and I want to say hello.

I don’t think I’ve ever heard prettier words than...

Sat, 03 Mar 2012 23:27:22 -0500

I don’t think I’ve ever heard prettier words than these. On loop since I woke up.

There must be more to this than the 1:14 minutes. =/

Okay. I think it’s the eyebrows. Whoa. I might have...

Fri, 02 Mar 2012 04:07:52 -0500

Okay. I think it’s the eyebrows.

Whoa. I might have stumbled onto something there.

I'm not an autograph-taker.

Wed, 29 Feb 2012 13:29:29 -0500

I don’t usually want celebrity signatures on books and napkins and notebooks and bras. I’ve never stood in line to get a glimpse and some ink. So far. But even I, have a list.

Satyajit Ray- But Of course.

Bill Watterson, because he is a genius.

Sir A.C. Doyle, because I love his moustache.

Pieter Brueghel The Elder, because he’s made thatONE painting that’s probably going to stay with me forever.

W.H. Auden, because he’s the shit, poetically speaking.

Roald Dahl, because have you read him?

Oscar Wilde, because he’s the original SmartAss

Agatha Christie, because she really knows how to tell a story.

And

Stephen King, because even in broad daylight, he can scare the shit out of me.

There are more, must be. I’ve already come up with two more pretty awesome names while typing this sentence. Maybe I am an autograph-taker after all. Though, should I be worried that 77.77% of these people are very dead?)

SuchmuchGorgeous. I went to the Fair today, And I liked it.

Wed, 29 Feb 2012 11:39:00 -0500

SuchmuchGorgeous.

I went to the Fair today, And I liked it.

I do love Idiots.

Wed, 29 Feb 2012 11:24:00 -0500

I do love Idiots.:

Very browse-worthy.

Bookshelf Babble- IV

Tue, 31 Jan 2012 03:15:06 -0500

1. What book are you reading now?

Of Human Bondage by Maugham, Lolita by Nabokov

2. What are your favourite books?

Middlesex by Eugenides, The Complete Maus by Spiegelman, Hundred Years of Solitude by GGM

3. How did you learn to read?

I read thanks to EBD and second hand bookshops. Basically, I read thanks to my mom.

4. What foreign languages do you read?

None at all.

5. What’s the funniest book you ever read?

I haven’t read funny books (to a chorus of aww’s- S)

6. What books have changed the way you look at the world or the way you live your life?

Rabelais, (And the rest of the names after a considerable period of holding head in hand despairingly), Terry Eagleton, Foucault, The Cultural Studies Reader.

7. What books have affirmed what you believe about life or the way you look at things?

Middlesex by Eugenides, We Need to Talk About Kevin by Shriver

8. What are some of the scariest books you ever read?

Bell Jar by Plath, April Witch, Sybil by Schreiber , Metamorphosis by Kafka

9. About how many books do you think you have read in your life?

No Way. Phhbbt.

10. About how many books do you own?

Can’t say, don’t even want to try.

12. How much would you say you’ve paid in library fines in your life?

10, 15 rupees? (spirited interjection from Nakashi, after which)- make it a hundred.

11. How many books per month do you usually borrow from the library?

I don’t got to the library. I wish I could.

13. Do you read in bed?

Yes yes.

14. Do you ever read while walking or driving?

I read standing up too, like in the metro.

15. OK, let’s get real. Where’s the strangest place you’ve ever read a book?

In a forest area. I was alone on this cliff-y thing near our hotel in Ranikhet. Can’t think of stranger places.

16. Do you listen to audio books?

I’ve listened to The Da Vinci Code (because I had it!)

17. Has anyone ever read aloud to you or you to them?

Yes.

18. What was the most difficult book to read?

Hard Times. (Ha Ha), and Spencer’s Faery Queen.

19. What books do you intend to read but keep putting off?

Many yaar. I need t reread A Suitable Boy, finish Raag Darbari…

20. Do you buy new or used books, paperbacks or hardcovers, leather or collector’s?

New and Used, a few hardbacks. (ditto to BB III)

21. How do you feel about writing in books?

Only in pencil.

22. Do you lend books?

( A very slow and reluctant yes is drawn out after a while.)

23. What were your favourite books as a child?

Faraway tree series and Famous Five by Blyton, Sherlock Holmes, CBT stuff and Pinki

25. Do you ever read the ending first?

No, never.

Bookshelf Babble- III

Tue, 31 Jan 2012 02:54:00 -0500

(The frontispiece and title page of the first edition of Alice’s Adventures)

1. What book are you reading now?

A Perfectly Good Family by Lionel Shriver and The Halloween Party by Agatha Christie(Which has since then been finished and given a solid 4/5 rating- Swati)

2. What are your favourite books?

My head is swimming with books and I can’t decide. 100 Years of Solitude by GGM, Dance Dance Dance by Murakami, A Post Birthday World by Shriver, Hunger Games Trilogy by Collins, Goggle Eyes by Fine, This Charming Man by Keyes, Anything by Rohinton Mistry, The Harry Potter series (added through a post interview message with regret- S)

3. How did you learn to read?

Learned to read in nursery and kindergarten, but got into reading when I contracted jaundice, and was bedridden for two months. I’d finish two Enid Blytons a day and was very proud of it.

4. What foreign languages do you read?

None, Sadly.

5. What’s the funniest book you ever read?

Time- Waster Diaries, The Guy Next Door by Cabot and I’m sure there are more I can’t remember.

6. What books have changed the way you look at the world or the way you live your life?

Alice in Wonderland by Carroll, Peter Pan by Barrie, Mythologies’ by Roland Barthes

7. What books have affirmed what you believe about life or the way you look at things?

All the books by Shriver, The Alice series by Carroll.

8. What are some of the scariest books you ever read?

Dracula, The Shining by King, Dance Dance Dance and After Dark by Murakami, The Hunger Games Trilogy.

9. About how many books do you think you have read in your life?

No idea, can’t calculate.

10. About how many books do you own?

Quite a few, but clearly not as many as I’d like.

12. How much would you say you’ve paid in library fines in your life?

Maximum of around fifty.

11. How many books per month do you usually borrow from the library?

I don’t borrow books from the library. Usually buy them.

13. Do you read in bed?

Ya.

14. Do you ever read while walking or driving?

I don’t drive. Sometimes I read while standing up though.

15. OK, let’s get real. Where’s the strangest place you’ve ever read a book?

Standing against a traffic light?

16. Do you listen to audio books?

I don’t usually, but I’ve listened to the audio episodes of Tina Fey’s Bossy Pants and she’s very good.

17. Has anyone ever read aloud to you or you to them?

Ya.

18. What was the most difficult book to read?

Middlemarch by G. Eliot.

19. What books do you intend to read but keep putting off?

Mrityunjay by Shivaji Sawant, and I want to reread Anne Frank’s Diary (by, you know, Anne Frank.)

20. Do you buy new or used books, paperbacks or hardcovers, leather or collector’s?

New and Used, a few hardbacks.

21. How do you feel about writing in books?

I can’t get myself to write in book.

22. Do you lend books?

Yes Ofcourse.

23. What were your favourite books as a child?

Five Find-Outers, The Mystery Series by Blyton, Sherlock Holmes, Hardy Boys, CBT stuff, Pinki, Billu.

25. Do you ever read the ending first?

No.